Chiltern Wonderland 50 – 16th September 2023
Finally, the last 50 miler of the Centurion Running “Grand Slam” had arrived.
From the race website: “The CW50 is a 50 mile single loop around the beautiful Chiltern countryside. The route takes in 5600ft of climb and visits picturesque villages, bursting with history, featuring locations made famous by British film & television”. The ascent is only 100ft less than the South Downs Way – so not exactly a stroll in the park.
I originally started the Centurion “Grand Slam” of four 50 milers back in 2017 but Parkinson’s had got in the way. Now being armed with meds I was determined to finish it this time round. Having spent over 38 hours completing the previous three races in the series (South Downs Way, North Downs Way and Wendover Woods) it was a nervous build up to the race day as I didn’t want to cock anything up and let it all go to waste. My taper week was spent avoiding anything remotely ankle twisting.
It also meant taking the van and sleeping over in Goring-on-Thames, which was where the race started (and finished). Knowing my luck I would have got a puncture on the way so decided to remove the stress and arrive early. After an easy journey I parked near the race venue (the village hall) which was just a short walk from the Thames, and headed to the local chip shop which does a cracking cod and chips. Just as I got to the chippy I bumped into Geoff (another “slammer”) and his wife Amanda. We’d crewed previous races together and Amanda is the person you need when you have pre-race nerves. She is so bouncy and positive it’s like magic. You can’t help but grin.
I headed off down to the river to carb load and quaff the ginger beer. It was a lovely evening, if a little warm, which was a warning about what to expect on race day.
An early night was followed by an early start. Check-in opened at 6.45 and I was keen not to get caught in the loo queue. Whilst faffing before the start I bumped into more fellow slammers Ray and Shelagh. In addition to running the 50 milers we’d also helped crew an aid station during the South Downs Way 100 so we’ve developed a great friendship. We wandered down to the start with Matt who was celebrating his birthday that day and doing the slam too – hopefully his birthday badge would be added to with the huge slam gong. One bonus was that due to the hot weather forecast we were allowed to ditch our waterproof layers so some weight saved, although as I was carrying a spare bottle of tailwind my pack didn’t feel that much lighter!
The morning was cool but clear skies foretold the impending heat so the idea was to get as far as possible at a reasonable pace and then back off when it warmed up. The cut off was 13 hours and my “Plan A” was just to finish. As we told each other at the back, you don’t get points for style and everyone gets the same medal and t-shirt. I was carrying 3 bottles and a spare just to keep the fluids topped up.
The start of the race runs alongside the Thames for about 4km before heading off to join the Chiltern Way. While you’re alongside the river the path is quite narrow and there was a gate too so no point (unless you’re elite) in setting off quickly and we just trotted off gently, avoiding tripping over the tree roots dotting the path.
After about 2 hours and nearly 16km into the race was the first checkpoint at Tokers Green. I topped up my bottles, which was a bit awkward as the hands don’t work as they used to (thanks Parkinson’s) but the aid station crew helped me out, and I headed back out onto the Chiltern Way. It really is stunning countryside with rolling hills and some beautiful houses. I was employing my usual race strategy of walking the uphills, running the downhills and leaving the flats to how I felt at the time (which due to the apathy that Parkinson’s brings was mainly walking!). Just after the aid station I had some brain-fade as the route goes through a hedge but the signpost (with the markings) is set slightly back from the path so there was a couple of back and forth moments trying to spot the sign – which was obvious when you knew what you were looking for.
The route turned northwards, heading towards the next aid station at about 30km in the village hall at Bix (the village apparently gets its name from box shrub which grows in the parish). It was a chance for a quick loo stop as well as topping up the bottles and again the aid station crew was brilliant at helping me out. The temperature was still climbing and was over 25 degrees.
After Bix the trail headed through the impressive Stonor park, which was hillier terrain. I was glad I’d got poles as they helped me with the steeper hills. It was tough going and my head was dropping. At this point, I remembered my mum’s infectious humour and told myself to keep looking up, which did the trick. As we ran towards the 3rd aid station at Ibstone we passed through the village of Turville which was the filming location for the Vicar of DIbley. And just beyond that is the Cobstone Windmill, home to Caractacus Potts in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Unfortunately it’s on top of a steep hill and we didn’t have a flying car…
I caught up with Shelagh. We’d started together but she’d been slightly faster than me until now. We pushed uphill into the aid station in the primary school at Ibstone. As we entered, Matt departed, obviously more eager than us to get some finish line birthday cake. I dumped a hatful of cold water over my head and trundled back out onto the trail which was now heading west, past Hellcorner Farm – aptly named given the temperature, and Christmas Common (not so much). I also needed to dig out my third bottle which by this time had been heated up nicely so it was slightly tepid – but the fluids were much needed!
The race now turned south towards the 4th aid station at Swyncombe. We passed the time by finding out our best holidays, first gigs, best gigs, loudest gigs (yep, heavy on the gig scene) and favourite places to be in the UK and rest of the world. All the way Shelagh was overriding my walking apathy and we were overtaking a few people.
We then followed the Ridgeway along Grim’s Ditch. As I was running along the huge earthworks I found myself wondering why it had been built and how – it must have been an enormous undertaking with the tools of the time (Iron age). The ditch headed downhill so I made the most of the free speed to give it the full beans into the final aid station. We got out our headtorches as the sun was starting to set and we definitely didn’t want to trip over in the gloom now that we were so close to the finish. I made the mistake of using the aid station Tailwind rather than my own as apparently it was mandarin flavour too. Unfortunately, it tasted almost completely unlike mandarin and more like dishwater so I was having to take a few sips of the dishwater and then some squash from my other flask to take the taste away but I needed the calories and salts in the Tailwind (I drank over 6 litres during the race). It was a shame after the sterling efforts of the aid station crew to fill my bottles while my hands were on a go-slow.
In the dark the trail now wiggled its way into Goring. We went up and over the railway line and through the backstreets (including a slight navigational faux pas due to missing a sign in the dark) and we ended up in the parallel street but met the marshall at the right point so not a problem in the end. Putting the pedal to the metal (relatively speaking!) we crossed the finish line in 11 hours 56 minutes and 35 seconds. The Grand Slam was complete – and the slam medal is the size of a plate.
Geoff, Matt and Ray finished ahead of us, so they had completed the slam too – although we were too late to see everyone singing Happy Birthday!
Thanks to all the aid station crews for their brilliant support and help, it saved me a load of time. A huge thank you to Shelagh who helped me push through the apathy that Parkinson’s brings, and without doubt got me to the finish a lot sooner than if I’d trundled along on my own.
Originally I thought that the 50 mile slam (which has raised £1580 so far) was going to be the final 200 Centurion miles I was going to be doing this year…lol.